The Stuff Fantasies Are Really Made Of

Illawarra Mercury

Thursday December 13, 2007

JAMES JOYCE

BEOWULF (M):

Director: Robert Zemeckis

Stars: Ray Winstone, Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, Robin Penn-Wright, John Malkovich

****

Screening: Greater Union Shellharbour, Hoyts Warrawong, Roxy Nowra

Certain to rock the socks off Dungeons & Dragons geeks and their dads, this spectacular animated fantasy boasts a fire-breathing dragon, a rampaging troll, a he-man hero and Angelina Jolie in the buff.

It's only a digitised computer rendering of Brangelina's better half but she's even more physically perfect than usual.

When her pneumatic water-nymphomaniac demon seductress rises from the depths of a dark pond, purring in surround sound and completely starkers, it's the very definition of eye-popping movie erotica.

Back to the Future and Who Framed Roger Rabbit director Robert Zemeckis uses the digital motion-capture animation technique we first saw in his Polar Express to tell the story of Beowulf, hero of the epic 8th-century Anglo-Saxon poem of courage, pride and lust regarded as the most important work of Old English literature.

But this is the X-Box version of ancient history, with ripsnorting eye candy for lovers of sword and sorcery sagas. It's scary, violent and packed to the rafters with bloodlust and hero bluster.

The film opens in Denmark circa 507AD, where King Hrothgar (a digitally rendered Anthony Hopkins), his much-younger queen (Robin Penn-Wright) and his loyal Thanes are carousing in the great mead hall when the man-beast, Grendel, crashes the party.

The hideously deformed cave-dweller rips all the king's men limb from pixelated limb, biting off their heads and tossing them about like rag dolls. These are nightmare scenes unfit for under-10s.

When Hrothgar puts out the call for a "hero" and offers a reward, it brings ashore Scandinavian he-man prince Beowulf (a digitally buffed Ray Winstone), who's such a braggart he strips off for his death-match with Grendel.

But this is Hollywood, so the brawny hero's private parts are always obscured by a strategically drawn sword or piece of furniture.

Jolie's animated likeness is afforded no such modesty as Grendel's vengeful serpent mother slithers into the form of a nubile and naked temptress whose charms lead Beowulf into a secret pact that sets the scene for his fireball-filled showdown with a dragon.

The human characters look and move like digital waxworks at times but the motion-capture animation allows Zemeckis to paint pictures that could never be done as live-action. Beowulf's thrilling duel with the dragon, in particular, is a thing of beauty and terror.

More 300-style romp than Lord of the Rings-style opera, Beowulf's lusty, red-blooded re-telling of the legend makes the most of the digital trickery - at times it's so stunningly rendered you forget you're watching animation.

Sadly, only six Sydney cinemas are showing the 3-D version, which is by most accounts a marvel. The IMAX 3-D is said to be better again.

On the strength of the 2-D version, it may be worth the trip to get your Jolies in 3-D.